This Week's Naughty Knitting Pattern: The Frecklegirl Thong!

Disclaimer: I do not in any way claim this to be my own pattern. This pattern was made by Frecklegirl and is © 2005 kn1t.com. All Rights reserved.

Frecklegirl Thong

I designed this thong for a friend's bridal shower. She's a knitter too, so she got a real kick out of it. All of the guests, grandmothers included, had a good laugh. Let's be honest, couldn't everyone use a knitted thong?

This example is knit out of a lace weight wool. The wool isn't so practical, but it's the bride's favorite color. Ideally I would use a fine cotton, maybe Stork baby cotton from Dale.  

Instructions:

Gauge:

8 stitches per inch, size 2 needles.

Back:

Cast on 39 sts., knit 4 rows.

Row 1: eyelet row: k1 (k1, yo, k2tog), yo, k2.
Row 2: k3, p until last 3, k3.
Row 3: k all.
Row 4: k3, p until last 3, k3.
Row 5: k3, k2tog, k until last 5 sts, ssk, k3.
Row 6: k3, p2tog, p until last 5, p2tog, k3.

Repeat rows 5+6 until 5 sts remain.
Work I cord for 5 inches.

See photo of finished back.

Front:

Start increases.

Row 1: k2, yo, k1, yo, k2.
Row 2: knit.
Row 3: k3, yo, k1, yo, k3.
Row 4: k3, p to last 3, k3.
Row 5: k4, yo, k1, yo, k4.
Row 6: same as row 4.
Row 7: k5, yo, k1, yo, k5.
Row 8: same as row 4.
Row 9: k6, yo, k1, yo, k6.
Row 10: same as row 4.

Continue increasing in this manner until there are 33 sts.

Now start lace pattern while continuing to increase.

Row 1: k6, yo, k2, ssk, k2tog, k2, yo, k2, yo, k until there are 16 sts remaining, yo, k2, yo, k2, k2tog, ssk, k2, yo, k6.
Row 2: k3, p to last 3, k3.
Row 3: k5, yo, k2, ssk, k2tog, k2, yo, k3, yo, k until there are 16 sts remaining, yo, k3, yo, k2, k2tog, ssk, k2, yo, k5.
Row 4: k3, p until last 3 sts, k3.

Repeat these four rows until there are 87 sts.

Finish off with the folowing rows.
Eyelet row: k1 (k1, yo, k2tog), yo, k2.
Knit 4 rows
Bind off.

See photo of finished front.

Waist Tie:

Cast on 5 sts and knit I-cord for 40 inches, bind off.

Weave in all loose ends. Weave I-cord through the eyelet holes on half the front, back and remaining front eyelets, tying the I-cord in a bow in front.

© 2005 kn1t.com. All Rights Reserved.

The Torrid Triangle - Kama Sutra Cosmo's Way

This position could potentially be a strain on the back. If you feel your lower back getting sore or tired, lower yourself to ground, bed, whatever, and ask your partner to come down with you. If you like the angle you're at, but not the strain, cram some pillows under your butt to keep you lifted. Or, better yet, use a liberator wedge!


Cosmo's Kama Sutra Instructions:

At first glance, you might think this is just the same routine missionary position with him on top and you on the bottom. But, of course, there's a secret Cosmo superlift twist! With you underneath him, ask him to get up on all fours. Then raise your pelvis up to meet his penis. Tell him he has to stay put as you start moving your fanny up and down to get frisky.

Carnal Challenge

Why You'll Love It:

Don't be fooled by being on the bottom — you're definitely the one calling all the shots here. By lifting your pelvis, you're in charge of the speed and timing of every thrust — so move according to your wanton whims. What's more, as long as he obeys your stay-still orders, you also decide the depth of the penetration — the harder you push, the deeper he goes and the more you (both) moan.

Take a moment and enjoy your power trip! Here's your chance to tease him mercilessly by thrusting only halfway onto him. This will concentrate all sensations on the supersensitive tip of his tool. Then, when he least expects it, take the plunge and go all the way for a surprise rush of pleasure. 

Thanks for the tip Cosmo! Check in next Friday for another position from Cosmo Sutra. Alternatively, you can just get the book so you know all of them!

I Always Feel Like Somebody's Watching Me... O.o because of my panties

Yes, I had to do the song from the Geico commerical. Rockwell's song just fit so well with this. :p

Has a loved one given you lingerie lately? Better check to make sure they're not bugged! There are actually a few companies that incorporate GPS tracking devices into their lingerie!

Brazilian designer Lucia Iorio and her LindeLucy Lingerie line will keep track of you wherever you go. They have a line of "Find Me If You Can" lingerie where each piece comes equipped with a very large, pager-sized GPS sewn into the bodice. *scoffs* That's not noticeable at all. It still looks very sexy. *rolls eyes* Yeah, right. At least only those with the tracking password will be able to see where you are.

According to Iorio, "This collection ... is a wink to women and a challenge to men because, even if she gives him the password to her GPS, she can always turn it off. She can be found only if she wants to [be]."

Pros: Well, your significant other can run all over the city and hunt you down like a wolf after you tease the hell out of them. Sounds good to me. If something terrible happens to you, like you get raped and left for dead (God forbid), your family can track down your body with the GPS . If you have a terrible sense of direction, your significant other can tell you where you are and help you get somewhere. Nobody can bug you without you knowing. It would be hard not to notice the giant GPS device.

Cons: It's huge! Very clunky and unattractive. Sorry. It could be given by a control-freak spouse, but you could just turn the darn thing off. Overprotective parents? I don't think they would give this type of lingerie to their teenage daughters. If they do, there's something wrong with them.

If you want something a little less clunky and a little more high-tech, check out the Forget-Me-Not panties. Let's look a what is on the homepage:

protect her privates

Ever worry about your wife cheating?

Want to know where your daughter is late at night?

Need to know when your girlfriend's temperature is rising?

This amazing device will answer all of your questions! These panties can give you her location, and even her temperature and heart rate, and she will never even know it's there! Unlike the cumbersome and uncomfortable chastity belts of the past, these panties are 100% cotton, and use cutting-edge technology to help you protect what matters most.

make sure you will never be forgotten

forget-me-not panties™ have built-in GPS and unique sensor technology giving you the forget-me-not advantage.

And then, above the order button, it says, "Don't let her get away!" I'm not sure whether to giggle or be creeped out. O.o And read the testimonials. They seem freaky and somewhat fake.  This guy is totally an overprotective parent and I can't believe he would ask for a camera on the panties! >.< Creepy!

When my daughter hit puberty I nearly had a heart attack. She started looking like a woman and suddenly she was wearing revealing clothing and staying out late with her friends.

Rather than become an over-protective parent , I decided to try forget-me-not panties™.

They work wonderfully. My wife and I bought our Sarah several pairs so we can watch her around the clock, and if we see her temperature rising too high, we intervene by calling her cellphone or just picking her up wherever she is. My only comment is it would be great to have a video camera, maybe you can work that into V.2.

Thanks forget-me-not panties™, now we have true peace of mind.

Pros: Like I said before, if something terrible happens to you, you can be tracked down. I'm not sure how heart rate and temperature stats would help, but I seem to remember a bra like that which was supposed to alert security services if the bra sensed panic-like symptoms and send help in case the woman was being mugged, having a heart-attack, etc. Like I said before, a horny significant other could hunt you down. (I rather like that idea) They're discreet, so you can give the panties to someone and they'll never know they're being tracked (Both a pro and a con at the same time. A crazy significant other could do that to track you down and kill you. Creepy... O.o) Overprotective dads can keep an eye on their lose daughters and overprotective/doubting spouses can keep an eye watch your every move.

Cons: Someone crazy could give you these without you knowing there's a GPS device, track you down, and kill you. I understand teens can let hormones cloud their brains, but it's a total invasion of privacy for parents to give these to their daughter without her knowing what they are just to keep track of her sex life.

So, good idea? Bad idea? I have no idea. On one hand, yeah, they're a good idea as a safety device and maybe to give your horny spouse a run for their money. On the other hand, it's kinda creepy. O.o And why is there only GPS tracking undies for women? Men cheat, too! And why only worry about teenage daughters when teenage sons do the same thing? Why not boxers and briefs with GPS? Why pick on only women?

This Week's Naughty Knitting Pattern: 302 Calories, a Thong Knitted from Rope Licorice!

I haven't tried this pattern yet, but it does look like fun. ^-^ This was a free pattern on Knitty. They have lots of other patterns, so go check them out sometime!

Disclaimer: I would like to make it very clear that I do not claim in any way that this is my pattern. Pattern and images are © 2004 Dawn Payne.

Always wanted a pair of edible panties?  Been too embarrassed to buy them, or had no time for an extra shopping trip?  Found the prices in those fancy boutiques were just too high?  The clever knitter can make her own pair in a jiffy for very low dough!  The supplies can be picked up on a regular Friday errand route -- chopsticks with the Chinese takeout, candy at the video store -- and no one will be the wiser!  Enjoy your meal, then cast on at the beginning of the movie, and the panties will be ready for dessert after the credits!

Like all fine lingerie, these panties are very delicate. Knit gently. If you need your L-string to last longer than a few hours before use, you will need to keep the panties moist.  This can be accomplished by wrapping the panties in plastic, or for extended storage needs, spraying with a vegetable oil spray and then wrapping.

SIZE

Adjustable to fit most any consenting adult!

FINISHED MEASUREMENTS

Main triangle: 1.5 inches wide at base x 5 inches wide at top x 8 inches long

MATERIALS

Snack-Stop Red Laces [0 g fiber, but lots of corn syrup and even some carnauba wax; 8 yards per 2.25 oz/64 g package]; color: FD&C Red #40; 2 packages

1 set chopsticks [Mine sized to about a US#10.5/6.5 mm]

GAUGE

7 sts = 5 inches and 7 rows = 4" in stockinette stitch

DIRECTIONS

Using backwards loop method, CO 3 sts.
Beg with a RS row, work in St st for 4 rows.
CO 1 st at beg of next two rows. [5 sts]
Work even for 3 rows.
CO 1 st at beg of next 2 rows. [7 sts]
Work even for 3 rows. Do not BO.

FINISHING

For back string, cut [or tie, as necessary] a strand to double the needed length to give your desired rise measurement.
Thread strand through center st at CO edge of panties and knot ends.
This gives you a double strand for the back string portion.
Cut [or tie] double strand to desired waist measurement plus 6-8 inches.
Slip sts onto double strand, and then thread double strand under knot in back string.
Tie to desired waist measurement.

ABOUT THE DESIGNER:

Dawn Payne has acted in several adult entertainment features with favorite co-star Charles Hendrie.

Just like the famous actresses at the Hollywood studios, Dawn and her colleagues are always knitting on the set to pass the time between scenes.  Dawn is a big fan of Knitty and just loves the work of frequent contributor Natalie Wilson of iKnitiative.

New Book "Moregasm" by the Founders of Babeland Due in Jan 2010!

2nd book due Jan 2010 from Babeland co-owners and co-founders Rachel Venning and Claire Cavanah is already building buzz!

When Rachel Venning and Claire Cavanah opened the first Babeland sex shop in Seattle in 1993, they were determined to foster a non-threatening, comfortable environment for their customers to ask intimate questions about sex. They wanted to make shopping for sex toys a more friendly experience for women and have been dedicated to providing toys that are safe for our health! As an affiliate, I really get to see how much Babeland cares about customer health. They've been great at contacting companies for me and always answer my questions fully and promptly!

If you visit the Babeland website regularly or get their e-mails, you know all about the fun and informative workshops that they offer in Seattle and and New York Babeland stores. The Babeland website is also dedicated to providing sex advice, and you can find lots of How-Tos and other helpful info. What better than to pile all this info and advice into a book? Well, recently, Self magazine has hailed Rachel and Claire as "new generation sex gurus," and now these sexperts are sharing their knowledge with a touch of open-minded playfulness in MOREGASM: Babeland's Guide to Mind-Blowing Sex!

Now there's an ultimate guide to anything and everything sex-related! It covers everything from favored prophylactics and lubricants and even some "taboo" subjects. MOREGASM also seeks to ease anxiety about bodily pleasure, making it a perfect book for women and their partners. I, myself, have anxieties. Sometimes it's hard to let go and fully enjoy yourself. MOREGASM even has real-life questions that Rachel and Claire have received from customers over the years! Who knows! Maybe one of your questions could be in the book!

It's not out until Jan 2010, though. So you'll just have to wait and see!

Just a Little “Thank You” to Bad Dragon

I’d really like to thank Bad Dragon, and especially Runa and Varka, for being so great to work with.

Even though it would be too expensive for them to donate a toy to my blog, Runa was nice enough to respond to me very promptly and work out another deal. I tend to ask a ton of questions, and Runa has answered them all and very quickly. If you’re thinking of buying from Bad Dragon, they have great customer service!

Plus, their work is very unique and professional. I’ve never seen a company offer so many different options for toys. O.O I’m not sure how long I stared at the site trying to decide what I wanted. Custom colors, cum tubes, suction cups, different sizes and degrees of softness in pure silicone. I can’t imagine how many different combinations you could do. I mean, the number of toys you could make with all those options would be phenomenal!

I’d also like to thank Bad Dragon for their forum. It’s a great place to see other product ideas in progress, suggest ideas, and get to know others (even the Bad Dragon staff!). I’ve been looking it a lot to see the upcoming designs and to check on the progress of their new Werewolf.

And Varka has been great about keeping me in the know on the affiliate program in the works. I’m now a BD affiliate! Wh007! ^-^ I’m absolutely giddy that I get to be one of the first affiliates!

Thank you so much for being so great to work with! I absolutely love my toys! ^-^ Hugs to everyone!

Keep an eye out on my “Sales, Codes, and Promos” widget in the top right of my blog for Bad Dragon sales and promos!

And of course, they deserve the True kiss of approval. ^-^ Love ya!

 

I Truly Am a Sucker for Suckers – A Review of Bad Dragon’s Tentacle Dildo

 (I figured since this is a review for a furry company, I might as well let Emmie do the talking. ~_^)

Well, I was led to the Bad Dragon site from another reviewer’s site. Little did I know that they had a Tentacle. I’m not new to the world of tentacle dildos. I’ve had one before (review here), but I just couldn’t pass up this guy.

The Tentacle has a sort of matte finish to it, which actually makes it feel close to what I would suspect a tentacle would feel like because of how the lube makes it real slimy. The matte finish actually helps the toy hold onto lube and keep it slick. Mine is a level 5 softness and it’s nice and squishy, yet still can stand on it’s own. When it’s all lubed up, I’m not sure I would be able to tell it from a real tentacle if I was blindfolded. Careful when it’s all lubed up not to drop it. It’s like trying to hold a wet bar of soap. ^-^

I really wanted a Tentacle close to the color of the largest Tentacle in the picture above, but this was the closest that they could get it. I’ve used the option of “color pop” on my WindowsLiveWriter program to make the color a little brighter.

Unfortunately, Runa told me they tried it twice and this was the closest they could come. I was disappointed at first, but I’ve come to love “Tiny” (Yes, for some reason I named it :p) so much that the non-matching color doesn’t bother me anymore. I’ve grown to love the color on it anyway.

Experience:

I love the soft squishyness of the Tentacle. It feels so much better than my Tentacle from Whipspider, which is rather solid and too firm now that I’ve experienced BD’s. It feels much more like what I would expect a real tentacle to feel like. Plus, the matte finish holds onto lube better and really gives it that slimey, slippery feeling that I love.

The suckers narrow from a row of doubles, to single suckers. There’s also tiny little mini suckers at the edges of the suckers. They feel great all lubed up and sliding over my clit and labia. Also great for teasing your nipples and sliding over the rest of your body. (It would be interesting if the suckers really worked. I’d probably want one for each breast in addition to one for each of my openings.)

There’s also a small hole at the top that looks like it would allow for cum lube to shoot out of it if you choose the option of including a cum tube, but the Tentacle’s design doesn’t support a cum tube...dangit.. –.-

Having a “small”, it’s not so much a full-up feeling that you get, but a more wiggling in your nethers feeling. I have to admit, I might entertain the though of getting a “medium” or “large” just to see how a full-up feeling would be with this Tentacle.

The whole thing tapers from a larger base and looks like it has squiddy testicles. This Tentacle definitely reminds me more of a squid tentacle. I have another one that seems more like an octopus tentacle. Turned around, the squiddy balls are nice to rub your clit against while the Tentacle is inside.

 

 

Just to be curious, does anyone else think the Tentacle kinda looks like an elephant trunk in this pic? O.o

Material: Pure silicone

Lube: Best to use water-based, but you they have a list of lubes that are compatible here.

Cleaning: Warm water and soap, dishwasher, 10% bleach solution, or even baby bottle sterilizing mix. If you wash it with soap and warm water, keep a good grip on it. It gets real slippery and might slip out of your hands and into the sink. It’s a lot like holding onto a wet bar of soap! lol ^-^

Size: Mine is a small. You can see the different sizes here:

Size:	Small	Medium	Large
Diameter of Head:	1 Inches	1.27 Inches	1.75 Inches
Circumference of Head:	2.2 Inches	3.25 Inches	4.5 Inches
Diameter of shaft:	1.25 Inches	1.75 Inches	2.25 Inches
Circumference of shaft:	3.75 Inches	4.8 Inches	6.5 Inches
Diameter of shaft base:	1.75 Inches	2.6 Inches	3.25 Inches
Circumference of shaft base:	5.75 Inches	8.1 Inches	10.5 Inches
Total Length:	5.8 Inches	8.2 Inches	10.25 Inches
Useable Length:	5.5 Inches	8 Inches	10 Inches

Suitable for anal play: I don’t know about that. “Tiny” is a medium softness, and it has problems getting in me if I’m not wet enough. A Tentacle that is firmer and/or a larger size would probably be better suited for anal play.

Vibration Transfer: Holding a bullet vibe to the base transfers vibes all the way to the tip. I’d definitely recommend trying it. ^_^

Pros: phthalates-free, easy to clean, great design, slippery, slimy, wiggly, and I got it during October so I got free candy corn and a cute little pumpkin (I’m such a candy corn addict. Black licorice comes first, though. Give me anything black licorice flavor and I’ll be your best friend for life. Seriously. You don’t have anything right now, do you? O.O Huh? Anything? I’ll settle for some anise.)

Cons: The color couldn’t be matched exactly, but I’m over that now.

Summary: 5/5 Bad Dragon is a great group of artists and I can’t wait to see what they come out with next! (Mostly I can’t wait for the werewolf! I’ve been driving Runa nuts about it. ^-^) I love “Tiny”!

My two current BD toys. For some reason, after I cleaned them, the thought ran through my head, “I better put Tiny and Thor away.” So, I guess they have names now. They’re my first toys that I’ve named. haha I guess I’m a little weird, but whatever. :P

Click it to see the review of my Anthro Dragon dildo!

FTC Statement: The Tentacle dildo was purchased from Bad Dragon at a 50% discount and reviewed for this blog and on the Bad Dragon forum.